I return now to the First of what I call the Three Approaches. I believe these are fundamental ways to frame the world, go into it, and be in it. The genesis of this first one is really from a Pastor name Bill Hunter from some 20-plus years ago. He was a Methodist minister, and pastored my little Reformed church in Shandaken, NY of the USA some years ago. He has since passed away–but his legacy lives on. (Link to obituary below.) Often in his preaching at church, he would extend his arms in a big welcoming embrace, and say emphatically: “Just open yourself to God…”
I always loved that–I can still see his big smile, with large glasses on his aged face. In that moment he was expressing the heart of God, a heart of love. (Remember, I said there would be God-stuff here–please play along.)
What a beautiful posture, what a beautiful approach. He was NOT standing there with arms folded, fists clenched, scowling. He stood there smiling, arms outstretched and welcoming. I can’t honestly tell you much about what he taught me about Scripture, or Christian living. This is not to say that he was not a good teacher, as he was quite learned, well spoken, and very smart.
What I do remember was how he touched my heart, how he touched my soul, and how he showed me how to be welcoming and open to God.
The Reverend Bill Hunter influenced this blog–he helped shape me. He shaped me with a smile and outstretched arms, and an insanely simple message: “Just open yourself to God…”
But what does that mean? “Open yourself”?
A quick search on the web describes ‘open’ like this: allowing access, passage, or a view through an empty space; not closed or blocked up. https://languages.oup.com/google-dictionary-en/ Allowing access, and not closed. When we are open, we allow access to our minds, hearts, and opinions. We allow ourselves to be changed or influenced. We’re not closed to others, we are not closed to others thoughts and opinions. Expanding this, openness can also apply to how we perceive the world: Are we curious, or judgmental? (Ted Lasso) Can we live and let live? Do I enter relationships convinced my way is right, or that my opinion is right?
I am not saying you must throw out cherished beliefs, (religious or otherwise), values, or strong opinions. But can you be open to what others think or believe? If you live in America, you know we have very polarizing politics, and that the openness I am writing about is not the highest value for some! But can we not, each of us, start bringing some openness back? Can we bring some openness back to our tables, our discussions at the ‘watercooler’, our posts, our daily lives?
We know there are billions of us on this Third Planet from the Star Sol. There are numerous beliefs, ideas, interpretations, perceptions, and the like. Can we not simply ask: “What do you think about this?” “How do you see this?” “What is stirred in you by this information/happening/situation?” Can we be polite enough to listen? My dear wife reminds me to listen–not just bide my time until I can make my next point! I am not at times really being open to what my wife is saying–and I was told a long time ago by the Spirit to really listen to her. When I have, we have made better financial decisions, had softer/gentler responses to people, been helpful to people others missed, on and on. This is not just because my wife is amazing (Love you, Honey), but because I chose and choose to be open to what she brings to the table.
My wife and I married later in life-me in my 40’s and her in her 50’s, so she lived a 1/2 century before I showed up. How foolish would I be to not listen to her opinions? While some situations demand quick decisive actions, like emergencies, and too much poll-taking can prevent anything from getting done. But giving others a voice, and being open to others needs/desires can foster community, empowerment, and ultimately a more just and whole society, that I think we all really want, deep down inside. More to write on that later.
Consider openness as an approach to have with your significant other, child, co-worker, classmate, neighbor, or friend. Allow some access to their opinion, and yours–not just to label it as wrong or right, but to listen. We are all children of God, I believe. As I wrote in “Transitions” (see earlier post), I believe we are each a beloved Son or Daughter of God. This means each person is valuable, and each viewpoint is valuable. Yes, there must be consensus, and opinions have to sometimes become actions and policies, etc. But we can be nice about it, gentle about it, and kind about it.
Aligning with love starts with openness. It starts with listening-really listening. It starts with not seeing everything, or everyone, as out to frustrate you, hurt you, or taking something from you. It starts with not being angry with other drivers, (if you drive), assuming they are idiots. Maybe that erratic, distracted driver just found out a loved one is in the hospital. Maybe they will lose their job of they are late again, and so blow through a stop sign. (Giving real examples from my own commute. ) Can I pause, and listen when my 16 year old son asks me to “hear him out”? Or did I already make up my mind?
Let God/Spirit/Divine Flow do some mind re-making in your thoughts and opinions. We are not always right, have all the information, or have considered every angle. It just isn’t possible. Be open to the universe around you, what might be brought to you, taught to you, and given to you. You might be surprised, when you allow some openness into your heart. Maybe that annoying person is a lot more like you than you thought. Maybe you can be a little less annoying to others, by listening a little more, and hearing how that other person is experiencing life. Yes, we can be annoying to others–I know I can be-my wife tells me so, now and again.
So try it–actually do it, and become it–more open to God, yourself, people, and life.
When next I write my “new” post, I will write about the 2nd Approach: Lightness.
-Eric, the Wordsmith
PB6
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