The sun is rising behind snow-capped mountains with a winding river below. A new day-
How I started writing to the world…
(Writer’s Note: I started my Blog on WordPress in February of 2026. Now, as I have started also posting on Substack, let me take this opportunity to reintroduce myself to people who really don’t know who I am, or what I am about. So, here is the first of my “Reprints”, essays/articles I wrote, but you may have missed! Think of this as reruns of a beloved TV show that you never got a chance to watch the first time. Enjoy, and get inspired.)
From February 7th, 2026:
I sat here some two years ago, really. I was trying to learn to use WordPress. They say it’s easy–but it’s not, at least not to me. I thought I was pretty tech savvy–but this is not as easy as it seems. Eventually I figured it out–then started building this ‘space’, this place where I will reveal my thoughts to the world–and maybe somebody, somewhere, will care. Then another pause. Work things, and Church things, Life things, a myriad of things–and the months slipped by. No blame on any of those things, mind you, all of them are what they are. We all get busy.
Then it’s me and this MacBook, and a desk, and Arvo Part serenading me. Here we are (again). This is scary. I write it, hope it makes sense, and hit ‘send’ and away it goes. There are myriads of others who do this, write books, speak, do all the things I think I want to do, and do them so much better. (I imagine. ) But they too had to start just like this: write it down and hit send.
I know the Voice that spoke to me as a boy–that whispered that I came here to earth to do this–to write. Not that I am so special, or clever, but I am called, as religious folks, as Christians say, to do this. This is the time. This is the place. This is the moment-the now.
Every creative person, or not-so creative person has this moment. They paint that first brush stoke, write that first word, take that first step, smile, extend that hand, or whatever. A “job” I did is coming to an end. There’s no more ‘extra’ things to hide behind. There is no more, “I have to do this and this AND this, AND that–and then (then) I can write publicly.
It’s time–the Voice whispers: “Go–I am with you. Teach what I have taught you-teach what you have learned to any who will listen. Go forward. Go forth.”
Like the experience of the Prophet Elijah, in the Jewish Scriptures, there is only the Gentle Whisper: “Tell them this: YOU are my Beloved Son or Daughter, in whom I am well pleased. Peace be with you.”
If you know the New Testament Scriptures in the Bible–these are words God spoke over Jesus, and words Jesus spoke over His Disciples after his resurrection. You may not believe them because you think it is religious mumbo-jumbo, or you believe it was said and happened, but it is not for you. It can’t be believed, and surely there is no peace with the Almighty!
I am here to tell you that what was said over Jesus is being said over you: You are God’s beloved child–and He is not against you, but for you. He (They) is for you, no matter what is going on. No matter if you are not quite sure about Him/Her, even if you are not sure if such a Being could exist. Even if you are not sure, as you see “religious people”, (some of whom are doing all manner of crazy things), have horribly warped the path to God, filling it with landmines and barbed wire.
God is not just for you, but is at peace with you–has made peace with you, already. As Eugene Peterson wrote in his “Message” Translation of Paul’s Letter to the Romans: “And that’s not all: We throw open our doors to God and discover at the same moment that he has already thrown open his door to us. We find ourselves standing where we always hoped we might stand – out in the wide open spaces of God’s grace and glory, standing tall and shouting our praise.” (The Message, Romans 5:2-12, bold text my own)
Don’t “check out” as I quote the Bible, see that Peterson translates as we “throw open our doors to God”–as we open ourselves to God, we come to experience that peace, that Greater Reality.
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Later next week, I will explain more about me, in a Reprint called “What’s it all about?” But first, we will have Part 2 of “The 4 Components of Life, that one one really told you about”.Coming Monday/Tuesday.
-Eric, the Wordsmith
BP47-R3
Have thoughts or comments? You can click on the comment link below, or you can email me at the address provided. Have ideas you want me to write about, or questions? Want to tell me how much you enjoy (or don’t enjoy) my content? All are acceptable, but be nice, please. Thanks!alignwithlove85@gmail.com.
A vintage-style clock on a bedside table indicates 3 AM, and you can’t sleep…
Welcome new Substack subscribers!!
I believe all of life has Four Basic Components. No matter what you are doing, no matter what situation you are in, or who you are with, these four are in play:
1) TIME 2) TASKS 3) RELATIONSHIPS 4) RESOURCES
You may immediately say: Everyone knows this. Or, I don’t agree. That’s fine–please play along for now. I think we may sort-of know this, but we probably never delineated life like this.
Why does it matter?
It matters because some of the craziness in life we experience is due to NOT having these 4 in balance. We don’t have them in balance, or we are around people who don’t have them balanced, either. If we continue in life oblivious to this, and never reflect on it, we may well be running in multiple directions, never doing what we were “called” to do. We wind up angry and exhausted. We get frustrated with others, and then we might even escape into unhealthy behaviors to cope.
Over the next four weeks, I will break down one of these Components each week. I want you to take this opportunity to reflect on how these relate to you, and what you may want to do about them. I do not balance these perfectly, either, let’s get that straight! But, even starting to think about them can make a huge change in your life!
We will start with TIME.Align With Love is not a time-management blog. There are many people who write/speak on that, and say it way better. I do recommend Laura Vanderkam on my Helpful Links Page, and the direct link is here: https://lauravanderkam.com . She has many wonderful ideas on how to restructure your time and life. I listen to her daily podcast, and I highly recommend it. (I do not know her–just stumbled on her work a few years back.)
How do you spend your time? What do you spend your time on? How much time is spent on work? How much time is spent on the commute? Maybe you work from home, or do the child rearing. There is also the seemingly endless “little things” of life: Bill paying, oil changes, emails, or the school play or concert. Then we add in our interests: exercise, hobbies, and yard work, etc. You can quickly see the “list” is vast, and that the 4 Components intersect and co-mingle. But for the purposes of this blog, we will separate them out, and just focus on the Time piece.
Somewhere along the line, you made decisions about what you wanted to do with your life, or fell into them due to circumstances. Maybe there was an unexpected pregnancy, or an accident, or an ill family member, and you are now spending time handling something like that. I finally decided I was going to write (for real), and not just in a journal or in Word, but write for others to read. This takes, and is taking, time.
It takes time to write each week, like a few hours, from first draft, to editing, to then posting and promoting, and then redoing some of it for Substack. (I started on WordPress.) This is time I am not doing other things. I wrote in a previous post that my backyard needs some serious love, as I have been spending time doing this, and not working out there. I can’t really rake and weed, and type on a laptop at the same time! So, I do one or the other.
But to put a fine point on it,
what do we spend time on that really adds no value?
Our modern world is filled with distractions, some good, and some bad. I love a good movie, and I love my New York Mets. I am enjoying “Falling Skies” on Netflix as of the time of this writing. I listen to lots of podcasts, and now try to read all the amazing articles from all the fellow writers I am connecting with. This all takes time. Time on the Mets is time I am not watching/listening to something else. (No Mets jokes, please.) Time on one podcast or another is time I am not listening to other things. And it is OK. We seem, in America, to expect you to pay attention to everything, and still work, keep up the house, and love your family. You can do that to a point, but you can’t do everything. You just can’t. The time you are reading my work is time you are not reading another blogger/writer, or doing something else.
This is why I appreciate your time so much. I want (and hope) you leave each encounter you have with my work with this: you leave with something helpful, and something that shifts your life, in a good way. I want you to leave a little more loving and kind, to yourself, and others. I want you to feel cared about, and that God cares about you too, really.
I have listened to countless hours of news and politics podcasts, and can have a nice chat about current events. But does knowing about the Iran War really make me a better human being? I am not saying not to pay attention to the world, and do not agree that you should ignore the news entirely. But decide when enough is enough.
I am usually pretty good about endless scrolling/web surfing, but recently, a beloved podcast on the NY Giants had stopped posting, and I was trying to find out why. So, I was on YouTube, and then saw a video about “What really happened in the Challenger disaster?” Of course, I need to know that. I was alive for that, so of course I “need” to know. Then something came up about the Titanic sinking, then the Titan sub disaster. Then explanation videos of the “Backrooms” movie–have to check that out, in case I ever wind up there. Then a mortician’s page “appeared”, and then….
All fun to know, or entertaining, or interesting. But did I really need to know any of it? I am not knocking any of these YouTube creators, or any creators, or anyone who watches whatever. So much now is slickly produced, well made, and seemingly well sourced. But the next day, I felt nothing other than a “full-head”. I wasn’t a better person. I wasn’t more loving or kind. I didn’t grow.
I had more information, but not a better heart.
I was not more Aligned with Love, or more close to God and God’s character after all that video watching. If anything, I wanted to keep watching more stuff, and maybe escape a little from the seeming boredom of everyday life.
Ah, is that part of it? Is all the “content” an escape? Again, I am not knocking TikTok videos of cool recipes, as my wife has tried a bunch, and some are amazing! And yes, it is OK to be entertained by comical, but often staged, videos. But where does it end? I do not know that mortician, nor do they know me. I did like their videos, and have nothing against their “niche”. But if that person’s breakdown of how the people died in the Titan sub disaster kept me from being productive elsewhere, and I watched that instead of spending time with family, was that good? Again, I am not saying any content creator is telling you to cut out on family to watch/listen to their stuff, but they do want your eyes, likes and comments. The modern Internet is built on this!
Hey, I want your eyes, some of the time, too. But not all the time. I can get sucked in on my end as well, checking my subscriber count, or any likes, or comments. Some is necessary, as I think if you want to create on the web, you do need to hear the voices of your audience. But I need to sleep, eat, and attend to my life, just like the rest of us. This blog is a “side gig”, a passion, and a dream. I have a regular 9-5, and have to be attentive to that first.
My intent was not to kick off the Time Competent railing against any content creators. There is much content that is inspiring, informative, and doing genuine good—I want to be in that category. I hope you do too. My point is:
stop and look at what you are consuming from the internet.
Saint Paul wrote in his letter to the Phillipian Church in the Christian Scriptures:
“Finally, brothers and sisters, whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable—if anything is excellent or praiseworthy—think about such things. (Phil 4:8, NIV)
If you are new to me, I will connect things to my practice as a Christian. Paul is reminding that 1st Century church to not focus on negative or distracting things, but to focus on the good. This is wisdom for today. I went down an Internet “rabbit-hole” of researching intriguing things, historical disasters and such, but there is tons of content that is designed to take you down paths into all manner of crazy: conspiracy theories, attacks on other faiths, or other people. Content that is designed to have you focused on it, the creators, and their worldview, and not really improve your life.
Know when to click off, shut down, or turn the phone over. Look around. Breathe. Smile at someone in real life. Give a hug. Spend “in person” time with a friend. None of this is revolutionary, but when I see so many people with their heads down, looking at a screen, I can only wonder:
How would things be better if we put more time into actual dialog not behind a screen?
One of the biggest ways you can manage your time better is to simply reevaluate your interactions with tech. Give it a shot. I’ll be intersecting with TIME more as I delve into the other Components. Tech is only one of the things we let eat up our time, and getting a handle on that will dramatically change your life, especially if you are doom-scrolling at 3AM.
Until next time, when I write about the Next Component of Life: TASKS.
-Eric, the Wordsmith
BP46
Have thoughts or comments? You can click on the comment link below, or you can email me at the address provided. Have ideas you want me to write about, or questions? Want to tell me how much you enjoy (or don’t enjoy) my content? All are acceptable, but be nice, please. Thanks!alignwithlove85@gmail.com.
(And how to get some sanity back when they overwhelm you.)
A 10 kg cast iron weight being measured on a digital scale in a lab
Look for the real demands in life. Look for the real needs.
They may not be what you think.
We all know about demands placed on us. The Baby is crying. The phone is ringing. There’s a deadline at work. The test is tomorrow. My car needs an inspection. There are wildfires affecting much of the USA at the time of this writing, with thick smoke causing haze and making it difficult to breathe. There is a demand being placed on my body to actually breathe. (I am OK where I am.) Demands are all around us. I haven’t even gotten into social demands, religious demands, and scheduling conflicts. Modern life is demanding. It takes a toll on our minds and emotions, which I consider part of our soul. It affects our bodies too–we “feel” these demands. We know the approaching Boss or phone call means a new project, or a problem. Internally, we brace for whatever is coming.
For some of us, for a lot of us, life feels like we’re just “juggling” all the time: our families, friends, work, home, and domestic stuff, like groceries and laundry. Then there is all the political and social things around us, demanding we pay attention to that, too!
What do we do? What can we do? We can keep juggling. Keep adding. We can keep trying to please everyone, do everything, and run constantly. This leads to burnout and “breakdowns” in our relationships, work, and home life. Maybe we “blow up” emotionally, or we make snide comments. Maybe we complain at the water cooler. Perhaps we escape into streaming series, or scrolling endlessly on our phones, eating up time, and making the demands even worse. Like Ross and Rachel from Friends, we just want a break!
It seems counter-intutive, but we are going to have to stop and do some reflecting. If the proverbial “plate” is piled too high, it is time to scrape some things off. I have been intending to do a series about the “Components of Life”, and I think that I will kick that off after this. Great care is needed with this reflecting! It’s probably the wrong move to dump a demanding spouse, or walk out on our kids! (Never walk out on the kids. Get a sitter–and then maybe do take a walk for a bit.) Don’t get too extreme. But, maybe conversations are needed. Maybe children have been allowed to do nothing around the house, or are over-coddled. Maybe a heart to heart is needed with a spouse/partner to start getting to the bottom of any issues.
As I say again and again, I am not a therapist, so these are suggestions you can take, but are not to be seen as “official” counseling. But if I can get you thinking, that is my goal. If I can get you to see how you can Align with Love in this seeming “Rat Race” of life, that is part of my hope.
So how to handle those many demands? Of course I will come back to my prior posts on Ego, Expectations, and Myths. https://align-with-love.com/2026/03/09/the-unholy-trinity/ I called this the “Unholy-Trinity”. What do you want to do? What do you REALLY need to do? I know my wife will say: “The yard does not need to be perfect,” when I say: “I have to do these five things outside…” She is right. There are no “Yard Police” in my town. No one will fine me if my lawn is not mowed, shrubs not perfectly trimmed, or leaves not raked. Should I be a good steward of my home? Yes, but in balance with everything else.
I am writing now a lot more. It takes time to do this. So, my yards are less than pristine, and I have some overgrown garden areas with weeds. (These are out of sight from general view.) It bugs me, but then I say: “I am writing now. I have been putting this off for most of my life, and I need to do this. So the yards can wait.” Of course, if I use my low subscriber count as a measure, perhaps I would despair and go back to weeding!
I will not. I will keep on doing this, as I believe these words will find the right people in the right time. Some person reading my works and becoming a more Loving Presence is more important than the house looking like it belongs on the cover of a magazine!
You may not relate to my yardwork example. But we all have our own things. We all have the things we feel we “need” to do. It may be how we dress, or how we eat, or exercising, or some hobby, and we put time into that. But we all have limited resources, time, and relational constraints. Children need to be fed and bathed, taught, and time spent with them, at a minimum. Hopefully we do that lovingly most of the time!
But what you choose to spend time on will mean you can’t spend time on something else.
I recently had been spending a chunk of my non-work time doing financial work for a non-profit. There simply was not enough time to write this blog, and help out with that too. It was tough, as it is something I have a talent for, and I could genuinely be helpful. I had to listen to the Spirit, as we Christians say, and know it was time to “retire” from that work, and move into this. Transitions and training were made and done, and now I can be here, writing and knowing the non-profit’s finances are being handled well by others. I had to let go of my Narrative that only “I” could do that work, and that I was the “”best” at it. (This was my Ego. I had to release my Expectations (untrue) that things wouldn’t go well if the “Great Eric” stopped doing something!
I had to release one demand to take on another. Too often we just keep adding demands. In this modern world, we have unwittingly added lots of secondary demands: following social media being one. There is a constant stream of posts, podcasts and videos vying for our attention. Being a writer, I am now aware of all the “how to” content of how to grow my audience, increase subscribers, and make money writing. None of this is bad, but again, I can spend too much time learning all the things I “should” be doing to grow my audience, instead of actually writing.
In my Prayer and Quiet Time, that I call “The Renewals”, I sense the Lord telling me I am planting seeds with each post. No natural seed immediately sprouts! Some take days, or weeks. So I need to be patient. Of course, I can spend some time seeing how others do this and are successful, and I would be foolish not to. I should keep honing my skills, learning when to use “then” or “than”, and the like. But I do not need to listen to the “demand” that my follower and subscriber count means I am, or am not, a “good” writer! That is a Narrative. I can hear it, but I do not need to follow it.
We Christians believe that Jesus tells us to follow Him. (Matthew’s Gospel 4:19) He was the Original Poster, long before “like” buttons, and hearts! I wrote early on that Jesus told us take His Yoke on Him, and that it was “easy” AND light. https://align-with-love.com/2026/02/23/lightness/ Maybe you are not fond of Jesus telling you anything, even if you believe in Him, but I believe His demands are the better ones. They are better than the one’s we made up.
Aligning with Love is the best demand, I think.
Being loving to others and ourselves is how we live that out.
That is a good tool to start evaluating demands. What shows I am loving? What is kind? Is this Aligned with Love? Am I just escaping from something doing this thing? Maybe it is time to stop scrolling and go to bed, and take care of yourself. Maybe you can actually say: I can’t do this right now, but I can do it later today, or tomorrow. (I know some emergencies can’t wait, but some of us, like me, see EVERYTHING as an emergency. ) It isn’t.
I do not need to keep checking my phone to see if I got likes, favorited, or subscribed too. Does God like me? Does God love me?
Did God already favorite, like, AND subscribe to my life and heart?
Yes, I believe He did. That was the most important relationship, and now I can love my family, friends, and community, knowing God loves me. In my case, part of that looks like writing for you. For others it may be spending hours on the phone with a friend in need. Maybe it is working with politicians to add affordable housing or a grocery store to an area that needs it. Again I say:
Look for the real demands in life. Look for the real needs.
They are all around you. The kind word to the store clerk may mean the world. A genuine, encouraging comment on a post that only takes you an extra minute, may be just the thing a new-comer to some interest needs to hear! I wrote this before too:
See. Love. Serve.
See the real demands: people want to be loved and validated. It doesn’t matter if they are from the “other” Party, are religious or non-religious, nice, or a jerk. Be kind anyway. Love them anyway. We are all jerks at one time or another. Serve them anyway! There are many opportunities to serve in your community, and you can just look around.
During a snow storm this winter, I saw that some older neighbors had their driveway end buried by snow. I used my snowblower, as I was clearing my driveway anyway, to clear the end of their driveway up to their car. They could then get out and not spend hours doing it themselves. I saw, loved, and served. This is really not hard, if we can start practicing some openness.
But when we are head-down and scrolling, we can’t seethe real world.
I am not going to bash phone use, and I am using my phone constantly, like so many others. But, it makes a demand on me: It buzzes and alarms, and wants me to look at it. (Almost like a idol?) I must decide how much of a demand that block of silicon and circuits will make on me. I am old enough to remember a time before such devices. Yes, I did not know the weather instantly, or the baseball score, or the news, or who “liked” me today. But I had time for other demands. I saw the world, and the people around me more. That wasn’t such a bad thing.
Take a look at those “demands” of your’s. Who put them there? Someone else? Are you running now with a request made years ago, and that has long ceased being helpful or useful? Just look, and bring some love to the looking and to yourself. See how you can meet the real demands of people right around you: to be seen and loved.
I will be breaking this down more with a new Series: “The 4 Components of Life no one really told you about”.
Coming next week…
-Eric, the Wordsmith
BP45
Have thoughts or comments? You can click on the comment link below, or you can email me at the address provided. Have ideas you want me to write about, or questions? Want to tell me how much you enjoy (or don’t enjoy) my content? All are acceptable, but be nice, please. Thanks!alignwithlove85@gmail.com.
An open book of Psalms displayed outdoors with calligraphy pen and ink beside it
Welcome back! If you are new to this blog, on Friday or Saturday I will post something from my Vault, or one of my other Writing Projects. The Psalms Project is my attempt to take the spirit of the Psalms and re-apply them and write new ones for today. I am NOT trying to replace the amazing Psalms already in the Bible! I am in no way trying to paraphrase or restate each Psalm, but I do pay homage to them and other Bible passages, of course. While often meant as songs in the Hebrew Scriptures, mine are more like meditative essays. I invite you to play along, see what you might identify with or relate to in these. So, here is another Psalm for a Modern Day.
THE DANCE
I begin again. A thousand restarts–never ending, always trying, trying, trying.
And seeming to fail, fail, fail.
But I get up, again and again and again.
Does it ever end?
Practice. It hits me: It’s all PRACTICE.
It was never supposed to be perfect. It can never ever be perfect.
What is perfect anyway?
Perfect is a construct of my imagination–from a Tree, so long ago.
There’s an invitation to a Dance, ancient as ancient can be. Long before Us.
All the attempts to be “good” are the dance steps, but they were never the end. This was never meant to be done perfectly–only God in us can make it what it is meant to be for each individual.
So, I accept that it is Practice, never perfect, never done.
Begin again, rest in it’s undone-ness, incompleteness, and in that, there is beauty.
1 Step, 2 Step, 3 Step, 4 Step…
The Dance has been going on for so very long.
Get in on it.
Finally.
-Eric, the Wordsmith
BP44
Have thoughts or comments? You can click on the comment link below, or you can email me at the address provided. Have ideas you want me to write about, or questions? Want to tell me how much you enjoy (or don’t enjoy) my content? All are acceptable, but be nice, please. Thanks!alignwithlove85@gmail.com.
A person inserts a VHS tape into a classic JVC VCR player
If you are of a certain age, you will remember that sticker on the old-school VHS Tapes from the Video Store. (Yes, younger readers, before streaming, we watched things on physical media. This was even before DVD’s and Blu-Rays!) You had to rewind the VHS Tape, so you, or whoever rented it after you, could watch it.
Ah, a simpler time. I actually do prefer hitting “play” on my Roku remote, and off I go, but I digress. This phrase came back to me rather oddly, and I suddenly thought that it had implications for mental health. We remember things we did or said in the past. We remember good times and bad. We remember incidents and situations where we acted badly, or at least we feel we acted badly. We rewind mentally back to those moments, sometimes completely without intention.
As I have written often, I am not a psychologist or therapist, so what I write is my opinion, and should not be taken as any kind of mental health counseling. But I do think when we “rewind” in memory, gentleness is needed. Now sometimes, we really have done something terrible, or caused someone to lose their life. Maybe we did something that irrevocably altered someone’s life, like a drunk driving accident. I will come back to the more extreme examples, but for now, let’s keep it to less intense matters. For example, you lost your temper, or said something mean to someone, and feel bad about it. Or maybe you were on the receiving end of some mistreatment. How will you rewind to it? May I suggest you do not need to overly fixate on how “bad” you were? We quickly forget that we are all works-in-progress and don’t behave perfectly. I am not giving anyone license to be a jerk, but sometimes we are rewinding and not seeing ourselves objectively.
We can be too harsh with ourselves sometimes! Of course we need to apologize, and correct bad behavior. But sometimes we really didn’t do anything wrong, and just feel like we did. When you have OCD, so many interactions feel like “failures”. (I know this.) We may feel like we talked too much, or not enough. We fear we weren’t considerate enough, or forgot something in relation to the other person. Of course, some of this is normal and proper, but if we do it too much, we can get lost in “thought loops” of what we did or didn’t do right.
This is where the “Be kind” idea comes from. Give yourself a break! Maybe you were tired, or in-between meetings, or just had a life-upset, and just couldn’t be as attentive as you should have been. It is OK. Be gentle. You can also acknowledge these things to yourself, and if you are really tuned in, you can let the other person know: “I didn’t sleep well last night, and maybe I am not as fresh or upbeat right now. I may need more time to process this,” etc. Then you are being kind to yourself, before you rewind.
We can also choose how to rewind. I know there was a season in my life when I was much younger, more dogmatic, and caught in very addictive and self-destructive behaviors. I can rewind to those days, and bemoan where I am not “better” today. Or, I can realize I did not know what I know now. I had not been taught how to process my emotions and thoughts well, and I only knew how to be in react-mode. And react I did, to everything! Mood swings, withdrawing, oh, way too much to get into in this post. But the pain of that Non-Sense drove me to change, slowly, way too slowly. I’m glad I listened to that pain, now.
In a similar vein, I only really started to gain awareness of my OCD issues in the last couple of years. That has caused me to rewind to a lot of things, and see how I got “stuck” in repetitive ways of thinking and acting. I have to be gentle and kind to myself. I can grieve the hours lost, and the not knowing why some thoughts just wouldn’t “stop”. I wasn’t damaged or “bad”. I had mental-health issues that probably won’t “go away”, but can be handled better, one day at a time.
The Apostle Paul in the Christian Scriptures speaks to things like this when he says:
12 Not that I have already obtained all this, or have already arrived at my goal, but I press on to take hold of that for which Christ Jesus took hold of me.13 Brothers and sisters, I do not consider myself yet to have taken hold of it. But one thing I do: Forgetting what is behind and straining toward what is ahead, 14 I press on toward the goal to win the prize for which God has called me heavenward in Christ Jesus. (Philippians 3, NIV)
In the full chapter, Paul is talking about his growth in his faith, and becoming more like Christ. He recognizes he is not “there yet”, and has to keep growing. Notice that he says he forgets what is behind. I am no Bible scholar, but I think Paul does not literally mean to forget the past, but instead he chooses not to dwell on it. He speaks instead of pressing on to the goal: to become more like Christ, or as I say here: to be become more and more deeply aligned with Love.
We can’t wave a magic-wand, and undue the abuse, injustice, or neglect we experienced. But we can choose not to fixate on it, and live and love, differently today. We can love others, and ourselves differently, through embracing God’s love. Yes, I believe we can only truly rewind kindly with God’s help.
As I wrote earlier, we may have done terrible things that can’t be fixed with an apology. We may not be able to make amends for various reasons. Perhaps family has “cut us off”, or a parent or child has passed away. We must still be kind to ourselves, even if the hurt people will never forgive us. Again, I am not excusing bad behavior, or dismissing horrific acts, but at some point, there is only so much we can atone for. We must forgive ourselves, and leave it in God’s hands. We must, as I wrote before: release, receive and continue. (https://align-with-love.com/2026/04/07/help-for-the-obstacles/) We must release what we did, receive forgiveness, and continue living better.
In Twelve-Step Practice, it is encouraged to make direct amends, but if this is not possible, indirect amends can be made. Part of living better is to start living more as a Loving Presence.
As I so often write: try this. You will rewind in memory at some point, and probably often. When you do, to something you wince at, be kind. You might have been a kid, or a confused teenager. Maybe you were under the influence of drugs, alcohol, compulsions, or other mental problems. Maybe you did know better, or maybe you didn’t. Maybe you knew better, but were still too stuck in bad patterns to choose differently. Maybe you were fully aware and still were just awful. Regardless, be kind to yourself. God will, and has forgiven you! Turn to God, and begin again. I know, some reading this will scoff at the “God talk”, but give it a try.
I believe God will ultimately always be kind when He rewinds your life. It’s called grace. You can give yourself some of that grace too.So, please do.
-Eric, the Wordsmith
BP43
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