(That no one really told you about)
Welcome again, new Substack subscribers!!
Recapping:
Last week, I continued my series on how I believe all of life has Four Basic Components. No matter what you are doing, no matter what situation you are in, or who you are with, these four are in play:
1) TIME 2) TASKS 3) RELATIONSHIPS 4) RESOURCES
And why does this matter, I asked?
It matters because some of the craziness in life we experience is due to NOT having these 4 in balance. We don’t have them in balance, or we are around people who don’t have them in balance, either. If we continue in life oblivious to this, and never reflect on it, we may well be running in multiple directions, never doing what we were “called” to do. We wind up angry and exhausted. We get frustrated with others, and then we might even escape into unhealthy behaviors to cope. This further “unbalances” us!
Balancing these 4 are key to having a life that feels less crazy!
You can NOT do everything. You can NOT be everything to everyone.
Last week, I continued with the 2nd Component: Tasks. I wrote about how everything we do involves some kind of task, whether we enjoy it or not. I asked us to consider reflecting on tasks that add no value, or have outlived their usefulness. One example I gave were my Mom’s changing her curtains seasonally, and how that was a task I could let go of. Another was my Dad’s Christmas Eve Dinner, and trying to squeeze that in each year, and realizing it was too much.
In both the Time and Task Component, there are obviously relationships. This brings us to the 3rd Component of Life: Relationships. We all have them. We may not like them all–but we all have them. Just as there is always a Task and Time component to everything, there is a relational component to everything too. People ask us to do things. We have aging parents that need our help. We get asked to help friends move. We have to help our kids with homework, or life-guidance. Why?
Because we live in communities of connection. We are connected to the people around us in some way. Obviously, one is by blood, such as being siblings or cousins, or something. Then we have work communities, where we work together, at a job, or on some project. I am not speaking to the depth of these relationships. I am saying there is a connection that creates a community of some fashion. Maybe it is just that you live on the same street. There are also Faith communities, where you attend the same church, synagogue, or mosque. You might be in a Non-Faith community, where there is no thought of anything religious or spiritual.
We can not escape the Relational Component of Life. Even if you live alone in some cabin deep in the American Northwest, you are still relating to yourself, or pets, or wild animals!
Since we can not escape this, what can we do about it? Why does that even matter? Again, it matters
because bringing Alignment into our relationships is critical for a better, redeemed, humanity.
Am I saying that all your little interactions with everyone matter?
Yes. Yes, I am.
All these communities matter! How we speak, act, and think in them matter. Who you are in them matters! Your relationship with the grocery store clerk, or barista at the coffee shop, matters. Your relationship with your Boss, matters. Your relationship with other people in your household matters. Your relationship with God, or however you view the Divine, matters.
Will we be loving? Will we be kind? Will we bring some Openness, and some Lightness? I launched this Blog with a Trilogy called: “The Approaches to Life”, and I started with Openness. https://align-with-love.com/2026/02/16/openness/ To super simplify it: it is to have some open-mindedness to others. It is to NOT just assume they are wrong, immoral, or misguided, but to try and actually hear them!
Lightness goes along with it: to NOT take yourself and your opinion so seriously that you must always be (or feel) right.
One of my taglines is
“Be Open. Be Light”.
This is a Foundational Principle of my philosophy. It is the First of my Core Concepts. You can not get Aligned without starting to be more Open and Light–and you need God’s help. Good ideas and intentions are not sufficient. Please try not to bristle at that if you and religions notions and spirituality are not the best of friends. I am offering a gentle onramp to the Pathway to Life, to Alignment with the Love filling the Universe. We may not feel, perceive, or believe in this at all. But it is there. It is all around you.
Every interaction with other people is an opportunity to experience that love, or give it back.
As St. Paul wrote in his letter to the Church at Rome in the 1st Century: “Love each other in a way that makes you feel close like brothers and sisters. And give each other more honor than you give yourself.” (Easy To Read Version, Romans 12:10)
I happened to find that translation–and I really like that rendering. Love others in a way that makes them feel close, and honor them more than yourself. Do you see how much this is lacking in our culture in America? Yes, of course there are many who do this well in their marriages, families, jobs, towns/cities, etc. But there are many who do not! What could our world be if we would just start with some more openness and lightness? My God, if we were just more polite to one another! (And my wife said: AMEN.)
Sometimes these things I write may seem so obvious that it can be easy to skip on, or even ignore. But we know we all have work to do in this area. We are surrounded by a culture that is filled with people who are not Aligned with Love, whether it is consideration for consequences, or consideration of how someone might feel. And yes, this can go too far the other way, where we are afraid to say anything that may offend someone. But I think that how we say it is so important. A nasty response does not encourage a nice response from the other person!
Yes, yes, yes–we do need to be polite and respectful. It really does matter. Taking a breath when someone says something mean to you, can make a world of difference! Can we live with someone who disagrees with us? Can we? Can we be nice about it, and not post it for the world to review and comment on?
Ah–things to think on. I think deep down inside so many of us see the politics of our time, and the disagreements, and the fighting and arguing, and feel no hope. We feel like we can never get back to places of agreement. But I am here to tell you–we can. Just as it is easy to be mean, we can be nice. The whole point of Align With Love, this whole blog, is to help us get back there, both in our hearts, and with one another. It is intended to serve as a roadmap to better civility, to harmony, to working together.
We can have healing, in ourselves, and with others. God makes this possible! God has made this possible, and we need only to be open to Him/Her and receive some of that Lightness. Alignment is there to be found, to be practiced, and to be a transforming agent.
We can begin again. We can begin again with broken relationships. We can find peace in our hearts. We can revisit “old tapes” or “old data streams”, and let them be re-written. We can have balance in how we relate to others, and how, when, and why we do what what we do.
Join me. As I have said before, I am no Priest, Pastor or some guru. But I know, I know—I am supposed to keep telling you, Dear Reader these messages I am writing. Hear, and ponder. Take it all to heart. Don’t just get inspired, although I hope you do.
But ask yourself:
How can I be a Loving Presence in this situation?
Yes, we do need boundaries, and part of being a Loving Presence is to know when to step away to “recharge”. Did not Christ himself step away to pray? It is said repeatedly in the Gospels that Jesus went off to “lonely places” to pray. Whether you believe in Him, or not, you can not say He was not the embodiment of being a Loving Presence!
So, as you relate to others, do tasks, and use time–do it with love in mind. Do it with love in your heart. This is the Way.*
Next week–I will finish this series. The Final Component is: Resources. How do we use those? Do we use them well?
* From “The Mandalorian” on Disney+.
Until next week,
-Eric the Wordsmith
BP50--YES, 50!!!!! (BP is Blog Post.)
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